Thursday, November 24, 2011
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Ugly Christmas Sweaters
For the last two days on the news, there has been a buzz about how all the ugly Christmas Sweaters are running out of stock everywhere. Now I know people are losing their minds. Those unsightly Christmas sweaters were a dreaded present and now people are going crazy looking for them? Why? We didn't like them then, why is some people going crazy trying to find those old Christmas sweaters? Reminiscing is fun, but not fun enough to go on a massive search for one those dreaded sweaters and actually step out of the house wearing one. Then five years from now, people will be trying to throw away all those pictures of them in those unsightly Christmas sweaters.
But, then again I usually sway from the norm. I have never even been shopping on Black Friday and refuse to subject myself to the torture of standing in line for hours to get in the store, get run over in the stores and then stand in line again to check out. No thank you, I will stay snuggled warmly in my bed while thousands of people are standing in line at the stores exhausted and their feet killing them. I will stick to the original Christmas traditions of decorating, baking cookies and putting smiles on my children's faces as they unwrap their gifts under the tree.
Saturday, November 19, 2011
DPD Stage A Sickout on Friday
A handful of Detroit Police staged a sickout on Friday in response to Mayor Dave Bing calling for a 10% pay cut. Resources were called in to cover their shifts, the last thing we need is less police on the City of Detroit's streets. I'm not sure if staging a sickout is the best thing to do when people's lives are in their hands and depends on the police showing up to a call, but it is terrible how the Mayor wants to give them a 10% pay cut. Police officers work very hard and put their lives on the line for very little money as it is. You don't see politicians proposing a pay cut for themselves. Instead of what you see is so many politicians have been ripping off the tax payers and steeling money from them.
The city of Detroit is rated in the "Top Ten Most Dangerous Cities To Live In", Mayor Dave Bing should be cutting into the pay of politicians, instead of city workers which the city so desperately needs. We should be adding police officers, not cutting their pay. After all, they risk their lives everyday to protect and serve us. The politicians fly around in private jets, throwing big parties and living life as though there is no recession. It makes more sense to me to give a 10% pay cut to all city and state politicians. Politicians make more money than city workers and would give more money to the budget. 10% of $100,000 a year is %10,000 per politician or more, whereas most police officers are lucky if they make $40,000 a year, which only comes out to around $4,000 a year per worker. Do the math. Which makes more sense to you. But, then again it comes down to the politicians want to cut everyone elses' pay, but their own pay.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Bringing The Love Back
Every year in November, I dedicate the whole month of November on my Do You Really Want To Know? or the The Comfort Zone blogs to tips on bringing the love back in your relationship. This year I decided to condense it into one post, since I have been so busy with my website, I haven't had as much time as I like to dedicate to blogging.
The odds are stacked against us a married couple. The divorce rate in America is 50%, so what that boils down to is we have a 50/50 chance of getting divorced. It it is up to us as married couples to change that. We are the only ones who can change the outcome of our marriage.
The two main reasons couples get divorced are infidelity or money. Why are so many people cheating? There is a very simple answer to that question, people cheat either because, that is how they are wired or because they are not satisfied sexually or emotionally in their marriage.
We have to learn that we need to play a responsible role in our relationships. Talk to your partner, not at your partner. There is a difference in how you approach a topic with them and how they will respond to you. Your partners are not children and they should not be talked to that way. Instead of making accusations and mean comments, talk to them and tell them how the problem area makes you feel.
1. Never call them names or insult them alone or in front of others.
2. Don't discuss a problem if your angry. Walk away and calm down before you discuss a problem.
3. Don't make ultimatums you don't mean and that do not warrant the situation.
4. Talk to them, not at them.
5. Pick your battles wisely, not all battles are worth fighting.
6. Approach the situation with a resolution rather than focusing on what they are doing wrong.
7. Never go to bed angry, try to work out the problem before going to bed.
8. Always discuss the problem in private. Never air your dirty laundry in front of your children, friends,family, or a public area. There is a place and time for everything.
9. Remember, we are all humans and humans make mistakes. That is what makes us human or we would be machines.
10. Actually listen to what your partner is saying. You may figure out that you both are saying the same thing differently.
11. If you don't feel like you can get your point across to your partner, seek marriage counseling. It will do wonders for your relationship. There is no shame in seeking marriage counseling.
12. The big question. Would you rather get a divorce than to put your pride aside? Ask yourself that question, because if you don't the answer may be made for you.
The money problem can always be worked out together. You are given what you are given and there is no sense in blaming your partner for the money problem. If your partner is making bad money decisions, try making a budget together, so they can see what your financial situation is and what fits in to your budget and what doesn't fit into your budget. They may understand the problem, if they can see the big picture. But, talk to your partner as an equal and as an adult. Afterall, they are one, so treat them as one.
Infidelity is one of the biggest problems in a marriage. If you don't want your partner to look elsewhere for for physical and emotional support, then don't give them a reason to look elsewhere. Then if they do, then they are the ones at fault. Marriage and relationships are kind of like a bridge, if the bridge doesn't have the support it needs to hold weight of everything that passes over the bridge, it will collapse the same as your marriage or relationship.
When the newness of the marriage fades away, we forget the reasons we married our partner in the first place. Always celebrate your anniversary. You do not have to spend money to celebrate your anniversary. Put the children in bed, light some candles and try starting off by giving each other massages and take it from there. When women become mothers, it's like we forget how to be a woman again and men forget how to treat us like women. Before you were a mother, you were a woman. Don't forget that, it is crucial to your marriage.
Why is sex such a taboo topic once you have children? You had to have sex to create your children. Sex wasn't a chore when you first got married or was making children. Why is it a chore now or a taboo topic now? When you leave the sex behind in your marriage, you are giving your partner an open excuse to cheat on you. You can not expect someone to live without that connection with another person. Don't expect your partner to live without sex, just because they married you and expect them to remain faithful to you when you won't give in or make them intimidated to approach you sexually. Your partner should never feel neglected sexually. Sex is not taboo or dirty. Sex is how you were created and how your children were created. We would not exist as a human race if it wasn't for sex. Just because you are done having children, doesn't mean you are done having sex.
1. Stop using headaches as a reason to not have sex. Sex will actually give you relief for your headache or aches and pains. Use a headache just as a reason to have sex with your partner. You will be surprised how much sex can relieve stress.
2. If your partner isn't getting what you like in the bedroom respectfully guide them to what you do like. Try letting them know when they are doing something right, so they can figure out what you do like or try telling them something like "how about you do this baby? That really turns me on when you do that.
3. Never go more than a week without sex in your relationship. Do you really want your partner turned by someone else outside of your home?
4. Initiate sex, never leave it up to your partner to always be the one to initiate sex.
5. Buy some sexy lingerie or massage oil. Have fun with it. Lingerie can actually boost your self confidence in your appearance. Pick out lingerie that hides those parts of your body you are uncomfortable with. Lingerie is not sleazy or dirty. It was designed to make you feel like a woman and enhance your sex life.
6. Don't worry about your body. Men know women's bodies change after having children. They love you more for having their children. Believe me, they are not looking at those parts of your body. They are focusing on your breasts or your behind. Your behind always looks better bent over. Most likely their bodies have changed too since marriage and age. Men love older women. Most men with children do not want a young woman. They want a woman who is attainable and does not remind them of their children. Have you ever heard the term "MILF"? Well, it's true they want you. I know, I am not real crazy about the term either, but that is how men think.
This is a very lengthy post and I hope you have managed to stay with me to reach the end. I really dislike how so many marriages in the United States fall apart and our children are left with the broken homes and trying their best to live with their parents divorce. Marriage is one of the hardest challenges you will ever face in your lifetime. It is not the fairytale we all think it is going to be. Your success and happiness in your marriage falls in your hands and your partner's hands. You and your partner are the only ones who can control the fate of your marriage. Don't be stubborn, put your pride aside and work on your marriage. You are most likely more right for your partner than you think. Unless there is physical or mental abuse involved in your marriage, it is most likely worth saving. You fell in love with your partner for a reason, you just need to remember why and work at your marriage.
If you read back in my posts from Do You Really Want To Know? or the The Comfort Zone you will find various tips on bringing the love back in your marriage. I decided a couple of years ago to start dedicating the month of November to bringing the love back in your marriage for a couple of reasons. One, I am on my third marriage, it has taken me this long to figure out where I was going wrong. Don't let that be you. The funny thing is, I actually have two degrees in psychology and I didn't put those degrees to work in my own relationships until my third marriage started falling apart and decided to seek marriage counseling to help solve our problems. We found we were both making silly mistakes and most of our problems were not actually problems. We were not actively listening to one another and we were both saying the same thing. Second, we get so busy around the holidays trying to make it fun for our children we spend the next two months focusing on Christmas and by New Years, our relationships are drained. Third, the funny thing happened once I opened a lingerie web store, some people stopped following me and I noticed it was all women. I thought to myself "Why do some women think it is so dirty or such a taboo to sell lingerie?" Lingerie is an essential tool in getting and keeping your partner's interest.
The most important information to take from this post is to treat your partner like an adult, actively listen to what they are saying, talk to them not at them, never use name calling or insults in arguments, talk to each other about how your feeling and find a solution everyone will be happy with, and keep your partner's interest in you physically and emotionally. Most importantly, play an active role in your relationship. It takes two people to make it work. Don't put the responsibility on one person's shoulders. Give them the respect and trust they deserve.
The odds are stacked against us a married couple. The divorce rate in America is 50%, so what that boils down to is we have a 50/50 chance of getting divorced. It it is up to us as married couples to change that. We are the only ones who can change the outcome of our marriage.
The two main reasons couples get divorced are infidelity or money. Why are so many people cheating? There is a very simple answer to that question, people cheat either because, that is how they are wired or because they are not satisfied sexually or emotionally in their marriage.
We have to learn that we need to play a responsible role in our relationships. Talk to your partner, not at your partner. There is a difference in how you approach a topic with them and how they will respond to you. Your partners are not children and they should not be talked to that way. Instead of making accusations and mean comments, talk to them and tell them how the problem area makes you feel.
1. Never call them names or insult them alone or in front of others.
2. Don't discuss a problem if your angry. Walk away and calm down before you discuss a problem.
3. Don't make ultimatums you don't mean and that do not warrant the situation.
4. Talk to them, not at them.
5. Pick your battles wisely, not all battles are worth fighting.
6. Approach the situation with a resolution rather than focusing on what they are doing wrong.
7. Never go to bed angry, try to work out the problem before going to bed.
8. Always discuss the problem in private. Never air your dirty laundry in front of your children, friends,family, or a public area. There is a place and time for everything.
9. Remember, we are all humans and humans make mistakes. That is what makes us human or we would be machines.
10. Actually listen to what your partner is saying. You may figure out that you both are saying the same thing differently.
11. If you don't feel like you can get your point across to your partner, seek marriage counseling. It will do wonders for your relationship. There is no shame in seeking marriage counseling.
12. The big question. Would you rather get a divorce than to put your pride aside? Ask yourself that question, because if you don't the answer may be made for you.
The money problem can always be worked out together. You are given what you are given and there is no sense in blaming your partner for the money problem. If your partner is making bad money decisions, try making a budget together, so they can see what your financial situation is and what fits in to your budget and what doesn't fit into your budget. They may understand the problem, if they can see the big picture. But, talk to your partner as an equal and as an adult. Afterall, they are one, so treat them as one.
Infidelity is one of the biggest problems in a marriage. If you don't want your partner to look elsewhere for for physical and emotional support, then don't give them a reason to look elsewhere. Then if they do, then they are the ones at fault. Marriage and relationships are kind of like a bridge, if the bridge doesn't have the support it needs to hold weight of everything that passes over the bridge, it will collapse the same as your marriage or relationship.
When the newness of the marriage fades away, we forget the reasons we married our partner in the first place. Always celebrate your anniversary. You do not have to spend money to celebrate your anniversary. Put the children in bed, light some candles and try starting off by giving each other massages and take it from there. When women become mothers, it's like we forget how to be a woman again and men forget how to treat us like women. Before you were a mother, you were a woman. Don't forget that, it is crucial to your marriage.
Why is sex such a taboo topic once you have children? You had to have sex to create your children. Sex wasn't a chore when you first got married or was making children. Why is it a chore now or a taboo topic now? When you leave the sex behind in your marriage, you are giving your partner an open excuse to cheat on you. You can not expect someone to live without that connection with another person. Don't expect your partner to live without sex, just because they married you and expect them to remain faithful to you when you won't give in or make them intimidated to approach you sexually. Your partner should never feel neglected sexually. Sex is not taboo or dirty. Sex is how you were created and how your children were created. We would not exist as a human race if it wasn't for sex. Just because you are done having children, doesn't mean you are done having sex.
1. Stop using headaches as a reason to not have sex. Sex will actually give you relief for your headache or aches and pains. Use a headache just as a reason to have sex with your partner. You will be surprised how much sex can relieve stress.
2. If your partner isn't getting what you like in the bedroom respectfully guide them to what you do like. Try letting them know when they are doing something right, so they can figure out what you do like or try telling them something like "how about you do this baby? That really turns me on when you do that.
3. Never go more than a week without sex in your relationship. Do you really want your partner turned by someone else outside of your home?
4. Initiate sex, never leave it up to your partner to always be the one to initiate sex.
5. Buy some sexy lingerie or massage oil. Have fun with it. Lingerie can actually boost your self confidence in your appearance. Pick out lingerie that hides those parts of your body you are uncomfortable with. Lingerie is not sleazy or dirty. It was designed to make you feel like a woman and enhance your sex life.
6. Don't worry about your body. Men know women's bodies change after having children. They love you more for having their children. Believe me, they are not looking at those parts of your body. They are focusing on your breasts or your behind. Your behind always looks better bent over. Most likely their bodies have changed too since marriage and age. Men love older women. Most men with children do not want a young woman. They want a woman who is attainable and does not remind them of their children. Have you ever heard the term "MILF"? Well, it's true they want you. I know, I am not real crazy about the term either, but that is how men think.
This is a very lengthy post and I hope you have managed to stay with me to reach the end. I really dislike how so many marriages in the United States fall apart and our children are left with the broken homes and trying their best to live with their parents divorce. Marriage is one of the hardest challenges you will ever face in your lifetime. It is not the fairytale we all think it is going to be. Your success and happiness in your marriage falls in your hands and your partner's hands. You and your partner are the only ones who can control the fate of your marriage. Don't be stubborn, put your pride aside and work on your marriage. You are most likely more right for your partner than you think. Unless there is physical or mental abuse involved in your marriage, it is most likely worth saving. You fell in love with your partner for a reason, you just need to remember why and work at your marriage.
If you read back in my posts from Do You Really Want To Know? or the The Comfort Zone you will find various tips on bringing the love back in your marriage. I decided a couple of years ago to start dedicating the month of November to bringing the love back in your marriage for a couple of reasons. One, I am on my third marriage, it has taken me this long to figure out where I was going wrong. Don't let that be you. The funny thing is, I actually have two degrees in psychology and I didn't put those degrees to work in my own relationships until my third marriage started falling apart and decided to seek marriage counseling to help solve our problems. We found we were both making silly mistakes and most of our problems were not actually problems. We were not actively listening to one another and we were both saying the same thing. Second, we get so busy around the holidays trying to make it fun for our children we spend the next two months focusing on Christmas and by New Years, our relationships are drained. Third, the funny thing happened once I opened a lingerie web store, some people stopped following me and I noticed it was all women. I thought to myself "Why do some women think it is so dirty or such a taboo to sell lingerie?" Lingerie is an essential tool in getting and keeping your partner's interest.
The most important information to take from this post is to treat your partner like an adult, actively listen to what they are saying, talk to them not at them, never use name calling or insults in arguments, talk to each other about how your feeling and find a solution everyone will be happy with, and keep your partner's interest in you physically and emotionally. Most importantly, play an active role in your relationship. It takes two people to make it work. Don't put the responsibility on one person's shoulders. Give them the respect and trust they deserve.
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Give Him Something Special For Christmas
Give him something special for Christmas. How about you wrapped up like a present? We also carry plus sizes, because we are all come in different shapes and sizes. We all should be able to show off our beautiful curves. Get his heart racing again in some sexy Christmas lingerie from http://www.eroticpassions.net/
Friday, November 11, 2011
Happy Veterans Day!
They Did Their Share
We owe so much to them,
On Veteran’s Day we honor
Soldiers who protect our nation.
For their service as our warriors,
They deserve our admiration.
Some of them were drafted;
Some were volunteers;
For some it was just yesterday;
For some it’s been many years;
In the jungle or the desert,
On land or on the sea,
They did whatever was assigned
To produce a victory.
Some came back; some didn’t.
They defended us everywhere.
Some saw combat; some rode a desk;
All of them did their share.
No matter what the duty,
For low pay and little glory,
These soldiers gave up normal lives,
For duties mundane and gory.
Let every veteran be honored;
Don’t let politics get in the way.
Without them, freedom would have died;
What they did, we can’t repay.
We owe so much to them,
Who kept us safe from terror,
So when we see a uniform,
Let’s say "thank you" to every wearer.
By Joanna Fuchs
Penn State Coach Molests Young Boys
This is a crazy world we live in. When I heard about the ex-Penn State coach, Jerry Sandusky, 67 years old was arrested Saturday for sexually assaulting 8 boys, I was outraged to find out that someone had walked in on him having sex with a 10 year old boy in the locker room and the person who walked in reported it to his higher up, but no one called the police. I don't care who the person is, if you walk in on a grown man molesting a child you stop it and call the police. Everyone involved in hiding Sandusky a known pedophile on campus should be fired from the their jobs and charged as accessories to a crime. Anyone else would be charged as accessories to a crime if they walked in on someone sexually assaulting a minor, so why shouldn't they be charged too. It totally amazes me that all those people who knew what he was doing turned the other cheek and and allowed him to molest children. They knowingly allowed him the ruin the lives of children. I don't know how they sleep at night knowing what they did. In my eyes they are just as bad as him. The very second someone found out about what he was doing he should have been reported him to the police.
Having a known pedophile on campus is against the law. Hundreds of children come to college campuses every summer for summer camps. The man should have not been allowed to get away with what he was doing for so many years. I am sure 8 children is just the tip of the iceberg, more will come forward to tell their stories now that it is out. Only God knows how many young boys has been molested by Sandusky and have had their lives ruined because someone failed to protect them. Curley and Shultz hid his dirty little secret and now they are going down with him and I am sure more will fall with them.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)